Episode 67 – Not Making Assumptions

 In Podcast

We are assumption making machines. We make assumptions about the motivations, intentions, thoughts and behaviors of other people. We make assumptions about groups of people and how others respond to us. Basically we make assumptions when we lack information and don’t seek clarity. These assumptions cause us great suffering! In this episode we explore the Third Agreement, “Don’t Make Assumptions,” and discover the freedom it provides.


Underlying premise

We are dreaming all the time, and unaware

Society’s dream – the dream of the planet

Domestication of the planet

We live with agreements we didn’t consciously agree to – many are false beliefs!

The Four Agreements are presented as new agreements – for Freedom

“All the sadness and drama you have lived in your life was rooted in making assumptions and taking things personally. Take a moment to consider the truth of this statement. The whole world of control between humans is about making assumptions and taking things personally. Our whole dream of hell is based on that.” Don Miguel Ruiz

We make assumptions all the time!

Other people – motivations, intentions, thoughts and behaviors

Groups of people

Situations (when we simply lack information)

How other people receive us

Relationships (I thought I could change him/her)


Our perceptions often vary widely from facts

We fill in the blank with our imagination

Don’t Make Assumptions!

Ask questions

Seek clarity

Ask for what you want

Maintain a spiritual practice

Dialogue Questions:

Take an honest look at your life. What agreements have you inherited?

What are some assumptions you are making in your life right now? They could be macro – about the world at large, or personal. Make a list.

How have you made assumptions in your life in the past and what was the result?

What impact would not making assumptions have on you? 

Share a time when you became aware that you were making an assumption that resulted in suffering, and shifted your awareness to curiosity and/or understanding.

What else does this mean to you? • 


As a spiritual person living in a physical world, I am mindful that my interpretation of reality differs from that of other people. When I assume something about any person, group of people or situation, suffering is usually the result. Realizing this, I vigilantly watch myself, ask questions, seek clarity and make requests when I have a need. I choose to live a life of empowerment and freedom!

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